So last night as I was lying in bed reading and catching up on the third installment of the sexy Mr. Grey, I realized I was only taking up maybe 1/4 of the total space of our king size bed, surrounded by my husband on the right and my baby on the left. Why was I so cramped when there is sooo much space on our bed? Well, my little princess has started moving in her sleep which means she now migrates out of her designated sleep area on our bed (we call it her "nido" or nest) and into my space.
I quickly recalled all of the days during my pregnancy spent going to different furniture stores trying to find the perfect crib, one that I would never use. Turns out it was one of those things that you think you're gonna need and then find that you don't once you decide on the parenting style than most suits you. The crib is gorgeous dark wood, covered by a beautiful vintage Winnie the Pooh bedding set complete with vintage Winnie mobile... all in soft pastel colors. The crib of my dreams that my baby has never once spent the night in. It now serves mostly as decoration for the room she also never uses. I put her in the crib sometimes during the day, but it's usually to contain her while I pick out her clothes. It's also sometimes used as a clothesline when the sun sets and Hannah's clothes haven't finished drying... we just hang them along the railing of the dream crib. There is also a changing table/dresser in the same dark wood that I've only used maybe once or twice.
Why? Because my husband and I opted for co-sleeping after I read up on it and discovered the benefits and realized it resonated with my husband who slept with his parents throughout his early childhood. During the first month or so we used a bassinet placed on top of the bed and saw how co-sleeping facilitated our nighttime nursing and the constant nursing during those *fun* growth spurts that occur in the first weeks and months. I was more comfortable using a bassinet because I did not trust myself to avoid rolling over onto my baby, but once I realized it was easier to leave her lying next to me instead of putting her back in the bassinet I stopped using it and relished the instant back to sleep reward. I discovered that the motherly instinct that is born the day you give birth is what keeps you from rolling over onto your baby. You sense every little move they make and the rare occasions you don't, you are quickly reminded that babies are remarkably good at letting you know if they are uncomfortable.
We all naturally eased into our bedtime routine and designated sleeping areas, with Hannah along the far left side of the bed and my husband on the far right, myself in the middle. We use a safety railing along Hannah's side of the bed to prevent her from rolling off and this sleeping arrangement has worked out great for us because by having her sleep closer to the edge of the bed, she is more ventilated (I produce way too much heat when asleep) and it leaves us more room on the bed (at least it used to). It's a pretty large king-size bed and you could probably fit four adults comfortably on it, but as my little darling has gotten older she has started taking up more and more space on the bed. She starts the night off in her "nido" on the far left edge of the bed, but will always search for me during the night which means that by 10 pm she has rolled over into the center of the bed, slowly inching me further into my husband's side. By the time morning comes along, she's taking up about half of the bed and my husband and I are snuggled up together on the other half.
Yes! We have come to terms with the fact that she is now the new queen on the block, but we wouldn't have it any other way. She has woken up on several occasions struggling to breathe which freaks my husband and I out and makes us even more assured of our decision to have her sleep with us because our response time is instantaneous this way. My husband is an incredibly light sleeper, drifting in and out of sleep often. The other night I was lying in bed engrossed in the end of the second installment of my new favorite book series and my husband was happily breathing in a slow rhythm that let me know he was in deep sleep when all of a sudden Hannah coughed. I'm not talking about the gagging I can't breathe kind of cough, I'm talking about a tiny almost non-cough, but that was all it took to yank my hubby out of his deep sleep state, sit up and lean over across my body to make sure his princess was breathing okay. He scared the living daylight out of me and I nearly jumped out of my skin, I couldn't believe how quickly he had transitioned from being deep in sleep to being completely awake on top of me and in a state of panic over his daughter. Let's just say I am no longer concerned over whether or not I will sense if Hannah needs me and wake-up because I am now 100% sure that my husband will.
Anyway, we don't mind having just half of the bed for ourselves because in the early days of our relationship we shared a twin size bed, so we can do small spaces and we're both very peaceful sleepers almost always waking up in the same place where we started. Because we hardly move, it's really funny to see how much space Hannah can cover in a matter of a minute when she has a wiggly-I'm-still-sleeping-but-rolling-across-the-bed kind of moment. It's not just the bed this little diva has taken dominion over, we have also lost control over our TV. The best way to get our morning started and the smoothest way to ease her down before sleep is putting on a half-hour of BabyTV. She loves BabyTV, when it's on she stares, she claps, she flamenco hands, she laughs, she dances along to the songs and even we can't help but sing along to them. All of the shows have songs that are so catchy and so repetitive anybody can memorize the entire repertoire on BabyTV. When our cable provider took it off the channel listing, we searched for another baby type channel as a substitute and came up short. No other channel would do, she would maybe watch two, at most five minutes before looking at us as though she were saying "what are you playing at? put my channel on!" Thankfully, about a week later BabyTV was back and peace was restored to our kingdom.
I have to admit that I am pretty fond of the channel as well, the shows are so cute and wholesome (except Drako, that dragon has a very *odd* shaped nose, and Popiz one is named Po and the other Piz... What's up with that?!) and it just brings me back to my childhood when my brother, sister, and I would spend Saturday morning watching cartoons before starting our day and checking off the long to-do list my Tiger parents would inevitably leave us before heading off to work. I really don't care to engage in debates over TV for babies and, just to be clear, I am not endorsing TV watching for toddlers. I'm just confessing that if it weren't for those 30 minute breaks of BabyTV I would never take a shower, would never go to the bathroom, and I would never be able to do anything that requires a moment of peace. I do, however, recommend baby TV at night if you have insomnia issues because there is nothing like watching the scenes of swimming fish, flying stars, and twirling colors while listening to soothing music to put you in that must sleep, eyelids sooo heavy state. I used to watch NatGeo to slowly drift off to sleep, but let me tell you there is nothing like BabyTV right before sleep... Don't knock it 'til you Try it!
But back to the point of this entry. Even if our lives have changed, even if we have lost control of our bed and control of our TV, this space where we are at now (if somewhat smaller and more cramped) is a much happier place. I wouldn't trade it for the world and I know I can speak for my husband and say he wouldn't either, so all hail the new queen on the block! You brought many changes, but change is good and just what this kingdom needed. Thank you Your Highness, Mama loves you!
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